I did not know the sky was blue,
I could not call the morning bright,
Until I heard a still small voice
And Lo, the world was filled with light!
I did not hear the morning choirs,
Nor heed the lark upon the wing,
Until I heard Him call, and then
The Universe began to sing!
Deaf, dumb, and blind, I walked His earth,
I breathed His air, a thankless clod,
Until that blessed summer's night
When my dead soul found life and God!
-R.S.C.
I could not call the morning bright,
Until I heard a still small voice
And Lo, the world was filled with light!
I did not hear the morning choirs,
Nor heed the lark upon the wing,
Until I heard Him call, and then
The Universe began to sing!
Deaf, dumb, and blind, I walked His earth,
I breathed His air, a thankless clod,
Until that blessed summer's night
When my dead soul found life and God!
-R.S.C.
- Mood:
happy
- Mood: cheerful
Sorry I've been absent for several months. I've been dealing with a lot since my mom died. I'm doing better, but not as good as I had thought I was doing. I have had stress and anxiety like crazy. But even that is getting better now thanks to therapy.
Now for the fun part. In a little over a week, Sunday the 20th, my family and I are leaving for Anthrocon. We'll get to Pittsburgh on the 21st. Tuesday will be fun. It's my 19th wedding anniversary and we have several things planned for the day including a nice dinner in the evening. Wednesday, we'll be going to the zoo and aquarium. Then, the hard work starts. My husband and I are on staff at AC this year. We'll be working registration Wednesday, Thursday and Friday morning. So, if you are going to AC stop by and say "Hi!". I have fushia hair and will be wearing a badge that is the same as my icon.
Should be a fun week. Now I just have to be patient and wait for the 20th to arrive.
Snowie
- Mood:
anxious
The new year is a time for reflection. Let's look back at the past year. Look back at the fun we had. Look back at the pain we felt. Look back at our relationships.
Now, let's look forward. What do we want to happen this year? Where do we plan to go? Is this a good time to begin a family? Should we try to fix old friendships? Lots of questions to ask. Lots of questions to answer.
Let's all try to make 2010 the best year possible. Keep an open mind. Open your hearts.
I wish everyone an amazing new year!
Peace and love to all!
Pastor Snowie
- Mood: hopeful
- Mood: happy
Take the time to reflect on the meaning of your holiday. Remember why we celebrate this time of the year.
I wish each and everyone of you Happy Holidays!
Peace and Love To All!
Pastor Snowie
- Mood: peaceful
Jacob wanted his father's blessing, which he knew was going to go to his brother. Rebekah told Jacob to pretend to be Esau and he would get his father's blessing. Jacob was old and his eyesight was failing. So, Jacob slaughtered a goat, put it's fur on his arms and made a meal with the meat. He went into his father and asked for his blessing. Jacob reached up to touch Jacob's arms and felt the hair. Assuming this was Esau, he gave Jacob his blessing.
Of course, Esau came home later and expected to get his father's blessing. He was very angry that Jacob fooled their father. Jacob fled, fearing his brother's wrath. He went to visit his mother's brother, Laban. While there, he fell in love with Laban's daughter, Rachel. Jacob told Laban he wanted Rachel for his wife. Laban told him her could have her after he worked in the fields for seven years. Jacob agreed and went to work for his uncle.
After the seven years, he asked for Rachel. Laban agreed, but secretly replaced Rachel with his homely daughter, Leah. After the wedding, Jacob laid with Leah, still not knowing it wasn't Rachel because she wore a veil. In the morning, he saw that he had been tricked. Laban told him that since Leah was the oldest, she had to get married first. But, Jacob could have Rachel if he agreed to work another seven years. Because of his love for Rachel, Jacob agreed.
Now Leah was very upset because Jacob loved Rachel more. God saw her pain and made her very fruitful and Rachel was barren. Eventually, Rachel told Jacob to lay with her maid so she could have sons that way. Jacob also laid with Leah's maid after she stopped having children. Some time later, God heard Rachel's cries and gave her a son, Joseph, who was Jacob's eleventh son. Leah also gave him a daughter, Dinah.
More time passes and Rachel gets pregnant again. With a son. Unfortunately, she dies while in childbirth. Jacob names his son Benjamin. That makes twelve sons and one daughter. Whew!
Joseph was Jacob's favorite because he was from Rachel and was born in his old age. He gave Joseph a splendid coat of many colors. Joseph's brothers despised him because of the coat and because of the dreams Joseph had.
His first dream, he was in the fields. He and his brothers were binding sheaves of grain. His brother's sheaves gathered around his and bowed down. His second dream was similar. The sun and the moon and eleven stars bowed down to him. These dreams made his brothers furious.
Jacob sent his sons out into the fields to tend the flocks. He asked Joseph to check up on them. When his brothers saw him, they decided they were going to kill him. But, because they didn't want his blood on their hands, they changed their minds and threw him in a well instead. A group of traders came along and Joseph's brothers sold him into slavery. Then the killed a goat and smeared its blood on Joseph's coat and told their father a wild animal killed him.
The Traders sold Joseph to Pharoah's captain of the guard, Potiphar. Potiphar came to care for Joseph very much because everything he touched thrived. Potiphar's wife also came to care for Joseph. She tried to seduce him and when he turned her away, she cried rape. Potiphar had Joseph arrested.
While in prison, Joseph interpreted the dreams of Pharoah's baker and cupbearer. Some time later, the Pharoah was having disturbing dreams. The cupbearer told him about Joseph. Joseph told Pharoah that his dreams meant that Egypt would have seven years of plenty, followed by seven years of famine. Pharoah made Joseph his second-in-command and gave him a wife.
During the seven years of plenty, Joseph had all the land give him a fifth of their crops for storage during the famine. Once the famine hit, Egypt had more than enough food, so they sold some to the neighboring areas. Joseph's family was suffering from the famine. Jacob told his sons, except Benjamin, to go to Egypt and buy food.
Of course, Joseph recognized his brothers. But they didn't recognize him. He accused them of being spies and said they only way he would believe they weren't spies was if they returned with their young brother, Benjamin.
The brothers returned with Benjamin. Joseph wept when he saw his brother. He gave them a huge feast and sent them on their way. As they were leaving, the guards stopped them and accused them of stealing a cup from Joseph. Joseph planted the cup in Benjamin's bag of grain. One of the other brothers said if the cup was found, they could kill the culprit and make slaves of the rest. When the cup was found with Benjamin, the brother's fell to the ground, crying.
Joseph told them who he was. Everybody wept. Joseph asked them to bring his father to him. Jacob was so happy to see his beloved son. He, and his sons, lived out their days in happiness with Joseph in Egypt.
Jacob's twelve sons became the twelve tribes of Isreal.
Sorry that was so long. But there was a lot to tell. Please read Genesis on your own. It really has a lot of good stories in it. This was actually the first time I read Genesis from beginning to end.
Peace and Love to All!
Pastor Snowie
- Mood: happy
I've mentioned before that I do not take the Bible literally. I just don't see how one can (even though some of my in-laws do). It comes across to me as a lovely collections of fables. Or life lessons. I do believe that God can do anything, but some of what's in Genesis is a little ridiculous.
The movie, The Bible, takes us from the creation to just after Abraham is asked to sacrifice his son. Let's start with that story. Abraham, whose birth name was Abrahm, was promised a great nation by God. He was told that this great nation would be built upon his son. But his wife, Sarai, was barren. Sarai asked her husband to lay with her maid in order to conceive a son. Abrahm agreed, thinking that this was what God meant, and Hagar conceived a son whose name was Ishmael.
God was not really angry, but He was disappointed that Abrahm didn't have any faith in what he was told. So, once again, God told Abrahm that his wife would conceive a son. Then, He changed Abrahm's name to Abraham and Sarai's name to Sarah.
Some time later, a trio of angels came to Abraham and told him that God was going to destroy the city of Sodom. Abraham's nephew. Lot, was living in Sodom with his wife and two daughters. Abraham asked if the city would be spared if the angels found as few as 10 righteous men. The angels said they would spare the city. They also told Abraham that his wife was about to conceive a son. Sarah laughed at that because, by this time, she was way past child bearing age. But the angels, once again, told her that she would conceive.
Sub-story: The angels went to Sodom and found Lot and his family. The people of Sodom wanted Lot to give them the angels because they were beautiful and they wanted to have sex with them. Lot said he would give them his two virgin daughters but would not give them the angels. The angles struck everyone blind and told Lot to leave the city with his family. They said not to look back as they ran. Lot's wife looked back when she heard the destruction. God turned her into a pillar of salt for her disobedience.
BTW, scientists and archeologists believe they have found the remains of Sodom and said that it was destroyed very quickly. Interesting, huh?
Meanwhile, Sarah did conceive a son. Abraham named him Isaac which is what God commanded. It was with Isaac that God would make His covenant.
Sarah despised Hagar and her son, Ishmael. She ordered Abraham to banish them. Hagar tried to cross the desert, but Ishmael was dying. She called out to God for mercy. God made water come out of the sand and told Hagar that Ishmael would be the leader of a great nation.
Oh, I almost forgot, Isaac was the first recipient of a circumcision. That was God's command as well and why many continue the practice today.
Many years later, God decided He wanted to test Abraham's loyalty and faith. He commanded that Abraham take his only son and sacrifice him. Without hesitation, Abraham took Isaac to the mountains to sacrifice him. Just before he killed his son, God told him to stop. He saw that Abraham would do anything He asked. God sent them a ram so they could have their sacrifice.
So now, I ask you all. Do you have that kind of faith and loyalty? Would you do anything God asked of you? Even if it mean destroying that which you love the most? How many of us have the faith of Abraham? I'm not sure there is such a thing as that kind of faith. Not anymore.
My next journal, I'll talk about another part of Genesis. Then, maybe when I'm done with Genesis, I'll just work my way through the Bible. Who knows where the Spirit will guide me next.
Peace and Love to All!
Pastor Snowie
- Mood: cheerful
Stores have aisles and aisles of Halloween and Christmas decorations for sale, but you'll be lucky to see one aisle of Thanksgiving stuff. It's been that way for as long as I remember. It was like that at the retail store I worked in 16 years ago. Things never change.
So why is Thanksgiving the forgotten holiday? Is it that the others are more important? As far as I know, just about everyone celebrates Thanksgiving. It's one of the biggest days for eating and watching football. But that's not all it's about.
We must remember the struggles and sacrifices the Pilgrims made when they left their country, because of religious persecution, and came to a new world. At first, they had little food and were cold and frightened. But, with the help of the local natives, they slowly adjusted to their new lives and began to thrive.
Then, a year or so after they came to their new world, they held a huge feast to give thanks for everything they had. And a great tradition was born.
Each year, we gather with friends and family and pig out. But how many of us truly reflect on the meaning of the day.
I think that each and everyone of us needs to remember the meaning of Thanksgiving and truly give thanks for what we have and have been given.
And I don't know about the rest of you, but for me, it's the beginning of the Christmas season. And, I surprise myself, I'm looking forward to Christmas this year.
I hope you all have a wonderful Thanksgiving!
Peace and love to all!
Pastor Snowie
- Mood: happy
I've felt more anxiety than ever. I can't sleep well. And when I do, I have nightmares. I am even uncomfortable at night. So much so that I need a light on most nights while in bed.
I keep waiting for it to get better. Easier. But it seems to get worse. Especially since my trip to the ER. I have panic attacks just about every night. Therapy doesn't seem to be helping either.
I think I'd completely lose my mind if it wasn't for my husband. He's been so good to me and so patient. He's my rock and my anchor. I sometimes don't understand how he can put up with my mood swings and temper. But, he's simply amazing. A true gift from God.
People keep telling me how well I'm handling mom's death, but I don't see it. I'm not sure I've accepted her being gone. I feel a need to call her and talk on almost a daily basis. I guess that's normal. I don't know. I just keeping wanting to wake up and all of it has been a terrible dream.
I find no comfort.
- Mood:
depressed
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